'You must have been raised on a farm'........

This is what Dr. Cornett said to me yesterday as he was beginning our consultation. On Friday, December 19th, I was walking across my bedroom, minding my own business. I tripped on my zorie & went flying towards my dresser. I tried to stop my fall by bracing my arm against the dresser, sliding across it far enough to knock the mirror to the floor (it was not attached, and did not break). As I lay on the floor moaning & groaning, I decided I was just bruised, crawled along to find a place where I could get myself in an upright position, brushed myself off & went on about my business.

Yesterday was the eleventh day, and my arm was still swollen & hurt when I turned it 'a certain way'. Those that know me very well, know I NEVER GO SEE A DOCTOR unless it is absolutely necessary. So, since I have never had a flu shot, and am heading towards seventy, I decided to kill two birds with the same stone. The good Doctor quizzes me & decides I need an ex-ray. As I exit the ex-ray room, he is smiling & shaking his head...'well Fran, you are tougher than me........your arm is broken.' 'It is??' Then he shows me the ex-rays & says he will put a temporary cast on & as an emergency medical center, he needs to refer me to an Orthopedic Surgeon. I do have a couple of those already, so that's the next step...unless this cast does the job :) As he was preparing my exit papers, he asked if I wanted him to prescribe any pain medication. Before I could say 'no', he shook his head smiling & said 'probably not'......'I'm sure you come from strong German descendants' Boy, he hit that nail on the head!

mama's passing 12/20/2006

Ashes to ashes

We Stallman girls, Frances, Barbara and Sandy, scattered our mother's ashes Sunday evening, June 29, 2008, from the top of Medicine Butte (in Lyman County, South Dakota) to the prairie below. It was a wonderful evening and tossing them to the wind was very spiritual for all of us. Sister Pegge (died suddenly that January) was with us in spirit.Mom was born just inside the Lower Brule Indian Reservation (about seven or eight miles north of Reliance) at the foot of Medicine Butte on the west side. We went to the top of the butte just at sundown (absolutely beautiful) with a wonderful wind to help scatter the ashes. As they flew away and down into the prairie, there must have been a downward current because the ashes would gradually gather into a beautiful puff and a ray of light would pass through the puff just before they disappeared. That did cause one to marvel at what one was witnessing.Sandy took a few pictures of the hills, prairie and Missouri river (off to the north) and when we were looking at them on the computer later, the first picture was absolutely beautiful with the greens and golds of the prairie with good old South Dakota black dirt here and there, and the sun peeking through. About dead-center of the photo is one lone bird flying westward. Was it our mother in her upward flight? I think, in our hearts we know it was.We then put her marker on our dad's grave in St. Mary’s Cemetery north of Reliance. When Marshall brings Pegge's ashes back to South Dakota, we will add a marker for her as well.
Posted by barbara stallman-speck at 5:07 PM
Labels: Ashes to Ashes

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Christmas is a time of Joy.......

Christmas IS a time of Joy, in the true sense of Christmas. It is almost Christmas Eve, and, I am not feeling all the Joy. I am feeling somewhat depressed. As I finished wrapping my gifts tonite, I felt like my gifts would disappoint. As my daughter says: 'It's the way YOU perceive things, Mother', and, she is probably right....She is Usually Right...dammit!

Growing up, our Christmas's in the 40's was soooo different of course. They were fantastic. A school play on a 'makeshift' stage. Sheets hanging over a wire to serve as the curtain. Oranges, apples & assorted nuts & popcornballs, all in a paper sack, handed out as we left the building. On Christmas Eve, Midnight Mass. Then home to see what Santa had brung. While Daddy was trying to manuever the car into the garage, Mama would jump out & go into the house 'to see if Santa had arrived' . All of us girls could hardly wait to see what was under the tree...sure enuf, as soon as we walked into the house, there they were..........four dolls under the tree....What a glorious sight! We would usually have oyster stew, and off to bed. That's all we needed to be absolutely the happiest girls south of Reliance. And, that is about how it went year after year. We were happy and greatfull every time.

I think we will all be forced to look at 'the good ole days' in the next few years...........'something terrible happening with our economy' . 2008 is getting worse than 'The Great Depression'. I have a feeling by the time Christmas rolls around next year, everyone will be more appreciative. Frohliche Weihnachten & ein gutes NeuJahr........

Olympic Developement Program (ODP)

This week Lauren has been accepted into the ODP program. This is a great honor for her. She has been playing Soccer since she was only four. I don't know if her father was her first coach officially, but do know he has been 'coaching' her throughout her tenure. She absolutely knows and understands how the game works. She is a great team player. She is only thirteen & has been in 'competetive' soccer for about four years. Everyone in her family is very proud of her. I think we have another 'Mia Hamm' on our hands..I hope so. It is up to her to develop. She will. So, here's to you, lauren...........we will see you 'At The Olympics'.............taotao

Pee Your Pants Laughter

Vicki, Lauren & I have periodic spurts of laughter that make us 'pee our pants'........well, Vicki & I do..... We howl and we howl ! Rileigh (not yet 3) gets 'caught up in the moment' as well. She will laugh heartily along with us, throw her head back, bend over & slap her knees, just to join in & be part of our hilarity.

Earlier today, my son in law, John, offered to drive me to an auto shop as I needed to leave my car overnite to have the brakes worked on. I phoned him to say I was going to run to the Dollar General store & be back in a few minutes. Wrong! I did go to Dollar General. I stayed about thirty minutes sorting through cute, cheap items to attach to my Christmas wrappings & picked up the cleaning supplies on the list for the intended trip. I'm checking out. 'That will be $29.38' says the cashier. I swipe my debit card...nothing appears on the screen. 'Do I need to swipe my card again' ? 'Well, maybe, this dern machine has been actin up today'. I swipe the card again & push the debit icon............nothing. She takes her pen & STABS, STABS, STABS the debit icon. 'Hmmmm, it's still actin up, the dern thing.........do you have a check, or cash' ? 'No, I only have my debit card' 'Hmmm, stab, stab.stab,stab....'I guess the dern thing ain't gonna work today' 'OK, then put the dern stuff back on the shelves' says I, as I storm out the door. I told Vicki & Lauren I did a 'donut' in the parking lot as I left rubber all the way to the street. I did'nt really, but wanted to...........so then I had to go to walmart & pay twice the money grrrrrrrrrr. I was late getting home, but have an understanding son in law. :-) I know we are in a recession, but wonder if Dollar General has any cashier openings !

I will sing you to me.........

I will sing you to me, is from the Aborigine. Sindi, Lauren & I went to see the movie Australia yesterday. It is an absolute 'must see'. Treat yourself by spending two and a half hours completely absorbed in the storyline and cinematography. I was moved to tears throughout; during one scene, a surge of emotion was absolutely uncontrollable. Lauren said it was the best movie she has ever seen. I'm fifty plus years older than her, and it has to be in my top five. Ashley will be here this weekend. We've made plans to get together saturday and bake Christmas goodies. Sindi makes beautiful gingerbread houses, so they are at the top of the list to decorate. Our plans are to leave our kitchen, include Vicki, Brittany & Ashley and head out to see it again. And I will hear you........

Bucky Smith from Kennebec

When I was only fourteen, (1953) I met a guy from Kennebec. This was a town about twelve miles away from Reliance, where I grew up. He was probably around sixteen, and had a car...... and half Sioux........HALF SIOUX INDIAN! This was surely going to get me in trouble with grandma, but it did'nt. Anyway, it was puppy love, and I'm sure it lasted a whole six months. He was my first boyfriend. That's about all I remember about 'that big romance'..........Forward to Thanksgiving Weekend 2008. My brother in law, Edwin & I were shopping @Al's Oasis in Oacoma. As we are about to back our truck out of the parking spot, this other person arrives to his vehicle parked next to ours, and Edwin hollers 'hey, Bucky,..... I have someone here you may remember'. Bucky peers into the cab of the truck & I tell him he was my first boyfriend eons ago. 'Frances, is that you?'..'....Oh, My God!, I can't believe it is really you...do you remember that we wrote letters?..whatever happened to?.....where do you live?, are you retired?, how many children & grandchildren and on & on......we laughed & carried on for thirty minutes. Going down memory lane was fun, but the truth of this story is..............If Edwin had not been there, we could have brushed shoulders, said excuse me, and gone on our way, never realizing who the other person was. Come to find out, he is a big land owner there in Lyman County...... I keep missin that damn boat.

I love you, pegge

This last posting regarding 'I love you a bushel & a Peck' brought up another memory. A year ago, come January, my sister, Pegge Smith died. It was a very heart wrenching moment. I remember being at her bedside in a hospital in Nacadoches, Texas. She had suffered a massive heart attack in the parking lot of the hospital. She & her husband, Marshall lived several miles away from this hospital. By the time Barbara & Edwin (my sister & brother in law from south dakota) & I arrived in Texas, she was already on 'life support'. I could not believe 'how she looked'..swollen, non responsive, swaying her head back & forth like she was wanting to communicate, but, really 'nothing there'....so, I just sang to her..................................I love you, a bushel and a peck........................

I love you a bushel and a peck.........

A couple of days ago my oldest grand daughter, Brittany, called & said 'taotao, I forgot one of the lines to You are my sunshine', she sang what she remembered & I sang the rest back to her. There are a few songs that were sung to me when I was very young, by my Grandma Black. (She is my mothers mother). When I was a very young teenager & lived with her for a period of time,( around 1950 ) she would wake me every morning with: 'Wake up you sleepy head, get up, get out of bed, when the red, red, robin goes bob bob bob'in along, along......the other song was 'I love you, a bushel & a peck, a bushel and a peck annnnnd, a hug around the neck. A hug around the neck, and a barrel and a heap, A barrel and a heap, & I'm talking in my sleep, about you,about you, frances ann, about you. Doodle, doodle, doo, doo, doodle, doodle, doo, doo, doodle, doodle, doo,do, do.........I love you, a bushel and a peck, ya bet your pretty neck, I do'. Then of course, there was 'You are my Sunshine', the Rock a bye baby, etcetra. Then came Vicki, (my daughter), Brittany, (my first grand daughter) Lauren,( my second grand daughter).........same songs, only I had to intercept her name into the bushel & a peck song. But, 'you are my sunshine' has always had a special meaning between lauren & I. I am singing all the same songs to Rileigh Shae (my third grand daughter) now. She is going to be three in February. I sang these same songs to my daughter, Vicki, when she was a baby. We lived in an old farmhouse in Chandler, Oklahoma @the time. As I would climb the stairs every morning to wake her, she would hear 'When the red, red, robin song & would be squealing in delight by the time I reached the top of the stairs.

Brittany will give birth to my great grand daughter in April, 2009. She says she is singing all these songs to her fiance, Jeff. I think she is just practicing for the arrival of Sara Presley Wells.

Knock, Knock, Who is there?

About an hour ago my doorbell rang. It is 7:30 pm & dark outside. I turned on the porchlight & peered thru my beveled glass window in my front door. I did not recognize the stranger outside. 'Yes', I said ....'Can you help me, Ma'am?.....I have run out of gas just below the hill in front of your house, do you have a gas can with enough gas to get me to a station? ' I think so', I responded without hesitation. 'Go around to my garage door, I will open it. There should be a gas can next to the lawn mower' There was a can with enough gasoline to send him on his way. Within 10 minutes he returned. ' Thank you, ma'am, I appreciate your hospilallity, I have knocked on four doors, no one would answer, so I appreciate your help......I can bring you some money tomorrow'. 'Never mind, ...I am happy to help you'. He was very appreciative & cast blessings upon me. I think it is a wonderful feeling to be able to help someone in need, even tho it is kind of scary during the onset. I always remember the phrase: Fear knocked at the door, Faith answered, 'and no one was there'.

Spend a day at the V A Hospital

When I was young, around 18, I moved to Farmington, New Mexico. My mother lived there with her second husband & I wanted to be near her. She had abandoned her children in 1951, when I was twelve...(the oldest of five). I loved her very much, understood 'why she would want to get away from my father', but did not understand the abandonment of her children.......still don't, but I forgave her years ago. It was in Farmington where I met my ex-husband, Gerald........ Oh, Man, I knew the day I met him, he was the person I wanted to marry ! We married in 1960, separated in 1970, and divorced in 1977. We had a beautiful daughter in 1962 and always stayed in touch during family get togethers, Birthdays & Holidays from the date of our separation and on, until our daughter was grown & married. By the early '80's, we both 'went on with our lives'. When I returned to Oklahoma to retire in the middle of 2004, things changed. Both of us were in our middle to late 60's. By the middle of 2006, he discovered he had cancer. Since I was retired 'with nothing to do', I offered to be the person to take him to his appointments, etcetera..........He is a Veteran, so Thank God, he has the V A Hospital to take care of him. He spent almost the whole year of 2006 in that hospital. We had very frustrating times, dealing with 'residents', having a new 'team' of Doctors every few weeks, (it's a learning hospital after all...) but he is rid of cancer. We still return to the hospital every six weeks for 'a procedure in radiology'. Today as we sat in the waiting room of the 'lab' for blood work, (it takes at least an hour for his name to be called), there was almost every disability under the sun... walking, riding a scooter, wheelchair bound, canes, canes, canes everywhere. Total & partial amputees, unkempt & totally unkempt, stinky & not so stinky people, low life & dignified people, they are all there, and they are ALL VETERANS.........GOD BLESS THEM. I Thank God each nite that I have good health, and not 'part of the troops that wander the halls of the V A Hospital'.

Bless us, O LORD, for these thy gifts...........

My niece Sindi & I made an impromptu trip from Oklahoma to South Dakota for Thanksgiving. We first surprised her son around midnite, picking him up & continuing on; showing up at her parents home @ three o'clock in the morning. It was a nice surprise for her parents as well. Her mother (my sister), was still awake & happy to see us. I've thought about this, & pray I will be as receptive as she, if family or friends knock on my door in the middle of the night unannounced. It is not good manners, & I was taught manners. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner. My nephews have their mother's recipe's perfected & carried in their assigned dishes.

We stayed four days. Sindi's son Morgan, lives in Sioux Falls. and had to be @work at 4:30 A.M. for 'Black Friday'. So, Sindi drives him back (two hours) & started shopping @five A.M., spends more time with Morgan after work & returns to my sister's home @midnite. She & Barbara wrap gifts until three. She purchased 'several wonderful bargains' for everyone ......she had a long list. I'm just too old to go thru that mess, but loved it when I was younger.

We ate leftovers, we ate leftovers, we ate several varieties of Barbara's homemade SWEETS, we reminisced, we played scrabble, we reminisced, (I have to put this in twice, because Barbara & I don't always 'remember the same' , she sometimes accuses me of being on another planet during our childhood. We drove the countryside finding the farm we lived on during our elementary years. We drove the road to our 'one room country school house'. Yes, just like 'Little House on the Prarie', which is actually in South Dakota. And, yes, we DID walk two miles to school everyday. We went to the cemetary where daddy & all the Stallman's are buried, & to Medicine Butte where mama's ashes are scattered. The picture at the top of my blog was taken during the scattering. We drove every block of our little hometown, which does not EVEN resemble the town where we grew up. Main Street is gone, along with any pride familys used to have in their homes & yards. I'm ashamed of how our old hometown looks.

I'm thankful that I am in good health and can drive a 700 mile stretch without incidence, to be with family during Thanksgiving, and thankful gasoline was averaging $1.65 a gallon along the way. I am thankful to be back home. I am sure Barbara is thankful to have her routine back. :)