SECOND EPIPHANY

Watching DR. PHIL this week, I had my second epiphany: regarding sarcasm as the lowest form of humor.... That is me for the most part of my humor. I have known for a long time that I do not have 'empathy', and I think it stems from my own childhood & upbringing. How in the world could I relate to empathy, unconditional love, and all that goes along with family? I masked everything. So, the mask is what I was most comfortable with most of my adult life. I'm not wearing a 'mask' anymore. I am still very blunt. I speak when I should keep my mouth shut, however, what I speak, is only thoughts amongst others that have discretion) and I apologize for that........I am not sure if I will ever correct my faults......So just put up with me.................Or Not.

TWO EPIPHANIES THIS WEEKEND

I'm trying to create an 'old hairstyle', Vicki gave me in the '80's' and am having a hard time. I found a new hairdresser & got things started, however, it was not working out....does not 'look like Vicki's cut'....can't make this old broad understand 'the firefly' style of the time. I KNOW she has been in business long enuf to 'remember the cut'.....So, the other day I dragged out some pictures of myself with 'the cut' & took them to her shop. She pretty much 'nailed it', and I feel confident, & eventually, it will be the cut I want. As I returned home, and took the pictures from my purse, I took a good hard look @who I was back then, & who I am now. For the first time, I think I have finally separated myself from those 1980 photos. It was a really sad situation, and I cried. 'Oh, My God!, I am not 'her' anymore, I am really seventy......It was a hard realization, I AM REALLY OLD NOW! I don't FEEL any older than those pictures I was looking at, but I AM!, ......and, my dears, SEVENTY AIN'T BAD! OLD is only a word. BAAHWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

THANK YOU, MAMA

Mama, you have no idea (or, perhaps you do) how happy your children are this week. We all received 'our inheritance' from you. Everyone is extremely happy & 'over the moon' deciding what we will do with our monies.

You can be well assured we all have great plans.... This windfall is appreciated so much. Know this: all of your children (and some grandchildren) are elated! Most know exactly what they are going to do with their monies...me, for one, have two or three avenues.

God bless you, & I pray for your soul everyday.

I love you so much, frances

TO BE THANKFUL

Yesterday, (November 11th, 2009), someone posted on facebook, a suggestion that we should post everyday, something to be thankful for until Thanksgiving day. Well, this would be an easy project to be involved...........and, it is, however, how many of us ever think of something to be thankful for on a daily basis? Do we just take everything for granted? Yep, I think so. So, I started yesterday, and posted again today, and will tomorrow and so on. In fact, I will start a journal on my thanksgivings. I think it heals my heart, and may be an interesting read one of these days for my daughter & grandchildren......................join me.

Do You Have 'Repeat Customers?'

The other day I decided to 'drop off' my comforter & pillow shams for a washing. I had seen an advertisement 'Drop Off Cleaning' from the street a few weeks earlier. & remembered the location. I enter the building, & there were about 30 machines in site and only one person using said machines. The premises had a less than a favorable odor, the trash cans were full, & only one patron in sight. I approached the counter & before I could speak, the woman behind the counter states 'over there, you go over there to wash big'....pointing to some machines. 'Excuse me, don't you have a 'drop off service' ?

'Oh ya, we have drop off service, you want drop off service?' 'Yes, please. I want this comforter & pillow shams washed' 'OK, you pick up tomorrow @6 o'clock. 'Six o clock? It is not even noon, how long does it take to wash'? 'OK, for you, I will have ready @ 10 o'clock....OK, good, thanks. As I turn to leave, she says 'you pay first'! Okay....I hand her my debit card.......'No, I don't take...only cash' so I only have $10........'OK, I take ten & you bring $10. tomorrow'....okay.

Next morning, (closer to noon), I return. The same trash cans are still full, the building still stinks & miss personality is still behind the counter.

Hi, I am Ms. King....here to pick up my comforter (I see it behind the counter). 'Yes, I need you ticket', so I look for it, to no avail..... sorry, I don't have my ticket.. 'I need ticket'.....'Don't you remember me?, I was just here............'yes, I remember, but I need you ticket.. (OMG! are you kidding me)........no, she wasn't, she didn't want to budge.....we went back & forth for @least 5 minutes.................'My God! remember, I still owe you $10.? 'Yes, but I need you ticket...... I just glared @her...'OK, let me see you drivers license' I hand it to her, she copies down my # and hands it back. 'You need to sign here' she says as she slides the ticket towards me. My signature is illegible, & looks like I'm scratching something out as I sign. She just stares at me & doesn't turn to get my comforter. Without speaking, I reach for my wallet, show her my signature on my DL, & then she handed over my comforter.

'Do you have much repeat business? I asked....she didn't even get the question, but the one & only man customer got it & roared!

For those who don't remember the '70's

I had the 'best hour of TV' tonite as I watched a Dean Martin Variety Show filmed in the '70's'. I literally laughed my ass off. What a treat! Those old shows were a hoot! Total entertainment on each show. Dean Martin had a variety show that ran for nine seasons. He never rehearsed a single show, and his spontaneous humor was hilarious, as was the action, or reaction, from all his guests. It was very entertaining to see & remember Frank Sinatra, Dom DeLuise, John Wayne Orson Wells, and several more. I've ordered a collection of his shows to dwindle in one by one every six weeks. Bonnie Hunt has a daytime show now & uses a replica of his old set for her show. She is dedicated to him & is rising in her ratings. I think she is very funny and fresh. Then jump to present day television.......I watched the Dr. Phil show today, & they were talking about teenagers & how they view sex. Absolutely shocking. He was promoting a new book entitled 'Oral Sex Is The New Goodnite Kiss'....And that it is common for teenagers to have sex on the dance floor @senior proms. Several teenagers in the audience were asked if they knew about this & some said yes & some nodded & smiled with the DUH! look............Give me a friggin break!

How Many Ways Does Love Have?

I went thru some old emails today looking for our Stallman Family Reunion information sent to me from my sister Barbara. I stumbled across an email I had sent her regarding a conversation between Gerald and I several months ago.

I had picked him up to take him to one of his procedures @the VA hospital. As we were driving, and engaged in conversation, he was telling me that he had been to a week-end outing at an antique mall. He said that on Sunday's, this particular mall had a cook out & 'live music'. He said that on the Sunday he participated, it was special for him because the band was playing all the good tunes that reminded him of us during our youth.

I asked 'what were they playing'? 'Oh, you know, Pennies From Heaven, You Are My Everything, Don't You Know, and all those good songs that we used to love & dance too, remember'?....'Yes, I remember'. 'And, I still love you'....I'm silent. 'You don't have to respond, fran.......I know you still love me too'.

'You know Gerald, that I do love you, but, not in the same way as I did back then'...then there was a silence, & he responded. 'How many ways does love have, fran'? I was speechless for a minute. Then I told him that there are all ways.... I just loved him..........and I still do.

Are You Making Good Choices, Jason?

OMG! I wasn't even ready to see or hear this! So, I am sitting in my pedicure chair @Walmart today, enjoying this week's National Enquirer...(yes, I read it every week)..........any way, all of a sudden I hear this blood curdling scream from what looks to be a little boy around two or two & a half years old, @a check out register. His big sister (around 10) is trying to calm him down, and being very patient with him. THEN appears his Mother, breaking her concentration from the 'check out person'. She stops everything in progress to bend over, point her finger in his face, & exclaim LOUDLY ...'Jason, are you making GOOD CHOICES right now? Jason does not respond. 'JASON, ARE YOU MAKING GOOD CHOICES RIGHT NOW...........LOOK @ ME, JASON.' His big sister is totally humiliated & only looks at the floor. Jason never responds, & the mother gives up the confrontation. I wanted to jump out of my chair and knock Big Mama to the ground, but she was bigger than me.

What the Hell.............he is two!!!!......are you making good choices? I just do not understand parenting these days. Who is the one NOT making good choices here?

They wheeled away with mama still screaming @the child. Mama, are YOU making good choices today? No, you, my dear, are an idiot!

Getting Lauren's Homework

Lauren has been sick most of the week with Swine Flu. I took her to the Doctor Tuesday morning. She is almost healed today (Friday), however, she has a lot of homework to complete.

Ring, Ring,......'.hello'......'taotao, can you go by the school & pick up my homework assignments'? 'sure' (this is @1:30) I have tile cleaning people in my house, & I have to pick Rileigh Shea up from pre-school by 2:30. I decide to leave immediately because the tile people don't want me walking around on their work. I leave the house around 1:45, get within 3 miles of her school & come to a complete stop on hiway 62 (close to 'downtown Newcastle, America') I sit there & I sit there. I decide to get off the street & find another route........what in the hell is going on here? My other route is not a good idea either............OMG!, they are having a parade or something.............yes, it is Homecoming, or something like that. So, OK, I can't reach the school, so I will just pick up Rileigh Shea early, so I do that, then back to the Middle School. By this time the parade is over, the traffic is flowing & I'm good to go. I arrive @the middle school, go inside with Rileigh in tow. 'Hi, I'm Lauren Martin's Grandmother & have come to pick up her homework'. The lady hands over several sheets of paper & says 'here you go'. Then I ask her 'are there any workbooks?' 'Oh, maybe, do you know her locker #? 'No' says I. 'Well, here is her #, take a left from here, and another left at the end of the hall & go all the way down the hall to the left, it's #3013.' So me & miss Rileigh Shea head out. After what seems like a 1/2 mile hike, we find the locker, & what a mess it is. I start digging thru books, & don't know which ones to grab, so I take most of them. Rileigh Shea is not feeling well & is cranky, my back hurts as I try to load about 80# of books in my arms & try to make it back to the car. I'm complaining about my back, & Rileigh starts to cry because 'you back hurts, taotao.' She is a very sensitive child, so I try to convince her that my back Does Not Hurt. OMG, Just get to the car! She cry's most of the way home because she is feeling sorry for me and my hurt back!.............we arrive & I ask Lauren why she has so many duplicate books............no answer that makes any sense to me, but I know one thing for sure, if she plans on returning all these books, she will have to do it 2 or 3 @a time on the school bus, or have her mother deliver them in person..............there is NO WAY she can carry them in one trip!

Ever Crack Yourself Up?

I crack myself up all the time............guess it's my own self humor & I love it. I just sent a tweet to my grand nephew who is very educated & has his own sense of humor. I'm sure he thinks I'm the biggest DORK, ever, but I don't care. In the tweet I sent him, I was trying to explain something to him & could not spell the word, so, I just picked out another word from the dictionary that made no sense whatsoever. :-)...............I laughed outloud!

SWINE FLU

My 14 yr old grand daughter, Lauren, has just been diagnosed with swine flu.....quite scary!, especially with a 3 yr. old sister. Two days have gone by and Rileigh Shea (3 yr. old) seems to be okay. Lauren is much better today & I am thankful. I am only recording this because of being gratefull & the history of it is quite new to all of us.

IS IT ME, OR ARE OTHERS AMAZED AS WELL?

I am continually amazed at present day education. What has happened to 'reading, writing, arithmetic,.......and, spelling? Especially with cashiers around twenty something. For instance, if my bill comes to $16.28 & I hand over $20.03, it throws the cashier into a tizzy if a calculator is not at hand. They are completely bumfuzzled & can't make change.

Last week I decided to open a checking account at a local bank because I bank @a federal credit union out of state. Having a local account keeps me from going to the ATM when I need to pay for service rendered locally. As I sit down to open the account, the bank employee gets off to a fumbling start, because she doesn't remember the password to open the computer. 'Excuse me, I'll be right back' she says as she leaves her desk to get the information. She returns and we continue with our paperwork. 'I'd also like to rent a safety deposit box while I'm here'......'Um, okay, I'll have to get Jennifer to help you with that'. 'OK, that's fine, are you in training'? I ask her. 'Oh no, I've been here quite a while, I just haven't done the safety deposit box deal yet'. We continue on & I pick out my style of checks, & endorse the check I'm using as my initial deposit. She continues to have problems with the information she is entering into the computer. Twenty minutes go by & she is delighted with herself. 'Okay, Ms. King, I think we are finished with opening your account' she says as she slides the check register towards me. 'Um, could you fill this out for me, my husband handles our money, & I've never filled one of these check book thingy's out before'.........true story. Guess I'll just keep a minimal amount of monies in that bank. I'm sure that I could get a job there if I ever need to go back to work!

BEEN RE-READING OLD POST'S

Remember the post called 'Address Book Found' Well, it was never 'lost'. Vicki had taken it for addresses to invite people to my birthday party. She was amazed that I was looking for it the day after she took it. She never realized that I use it almost daily!

See, how our habits change as we grow older? She NEVER looks at her address book daily. OH WELL!

GERALD KING'S OBITUARY

Gerald Elvis King 10/22/36-08/02/09 A graveside Funeral Service for Gerald Elvis King, 72, of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma was held in the Oak Park cemetery, Chandler, Oklahoma @2:00 Saturday, August 08, 2009. Mr. King passed away Sunday morning, August 02, 2009 at the VA Hospital in Oklahoma City, following a bout with cancer. Gerald was born on 10/22/36 at Chandler, Lincoln County, Oklahoma, to Herman Elvis & Fannie Lois (Taylor) King. After graduation from Farmington High School, Farmington, N.M. in 1955, he attended the University of Oklahoma for two years. He returned to Farmington, New Mexico and was employed by El Paso Natural Gas Company until he enlisted into The United States Army in 1959. He was transferred to a NIKE HERCULES MISSAL RANGE in Gary, Indiana. July 6, 1960, he married Frances Stallman, formerly of Reliance, South Dakota & Farmington, New Mexico @his parents home in Seminole, Oklahoma. Gerald & Fran were the parents of one child, Vicki Lyn King. Gerald was honorably discharged from the Army in 1962, re-locating to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. He & Fran divorced in 1977. They remained friends throughout Gerald's life. She became his caregiver during the last three years of his life. Gerald worked on cross country pipeline construction from 1965 thru 1972, returned to OKC to open & operate a Skelly Service Station on East Reno until 1978. At this time he became a Real Estate Broker, owned & operated KING/MIZE Realtors until his retirement in 1997. After retirement, Gerald dabbled in antique sales, and classic automobiles. Both were a passion of his most of his adult life. Grateful for sharing his life are his daughter, Vicki King Martin, and his ex-wife Fran King. He is preceded in death by his Father, Herman Elvis King, His Mother, Fannie Lois King, & one sister; Mary Louise Kiker. He is survived by his daughter Vicki & her husband, John Martin. Three granddaughters; Brittany Nicole Martin, (Jeff Wells); Lauren Taylor Martin; & Rileigh Shea Martin; One great granddaughter, Sara Presley Wells, all of the Oklahoma City area. He is also survived by one sister; Janice Carol King Holland of Chandler, Oklahoma; and his ex-wife, Fran King of Newcastle, Oklahoma.

GERALD ELVIS KING 10/22/1936 - 08/02/2009

Gerald passed away @1:06 this morning while Vicki & I were on the road to the hospital. I saw him at seven, but couldn't wake him for conversation. He would respond to my voice, but didn't speak.

He had a painless, alert last week of his life. He looked better than I had seen him look in several months, and was in very good spirits.......so good, in fact, Vicki & I were concerned he did not understand he was terminal...... :-) I called the hospital to make sure the doctors had explained everything to him.......they called back & said he understood everything. So, I am grateful for his pain free last week and his frame of mind, and sharing his sense of humor each day. I pray he was welcomed into Heaven by his family.

THE BIG SEVENTY HAS COME & GONE

I am officially seventy years old now, but don't feel much older than when I was fifty. True story. I see some differences, however, in my mind, it is about the same. I am very greatfull for that fact!

My darling daughter just absolutely outdone herself, pulling off a Huge Surprise Birthday Party for me! It was an absolute surprise, and I bawled out loud when I realized what was going on. I was in 'total shock'!

A week or so earlier, my sister Sandy called & said 'I am thinking about coming to OKC, so we can celebrate our birthday's together'...I'm thinking it is a great idea....'come on over, it will be nice to spend time together'. (I have four sisters..we all have birthday's in July, except for one. Karel is 7/23, Sandy is 7/24, I am 7/27, & Barbara is 7/29. Pegge is in January.) So, Sandy arrives on Thursday & I cook & we are really enjoying each others company. Friday is her birthday & I invite my niece Sindi to join us for her birthday dinner @ Johnny Corrino's. Fantastic meal (order the Jalapeno Garlic Talapia...to die for). While having dinner, Sindi announces that she has free movie tickets to the Quail Springs Mall theater,(about 25 miles north of our area, however, they must be utilized by the next day.....did we want to go to a free movie? Of course we did! Maybe Vicki & Lauren would like to come along too.....'sure', says Sindi, 'I'll ask them to join us'.

We get home & I call Vicki & invite her & Lauren & she agrees to meet us there, 'but, Mother, we have already made plans to take Rileigh Shea swimming @Paula's pool. "Paula's pool"? You mean 'Paula, who was your bridesmaid when you married John? I didn't know you and Paula were still in touch' 'Oh ya, we still talk all the time' says vicki. 'OK, then we will just meet you @the movies' says I. 'OK, Mother, sounds like a plan'.

Saturday nite Sindi, Sandy, & I meet for dinner & are getting ready to head north to the theater. On the way there, Vicki calls Sindi & says John has already headed home & can we pick her & Lauren up @ Paula's Apt. Complex (a couple miles from the movie theater). OK, now I'm bitchin 'why didn't John just drop them off on his way home' yadda yadda yadda....'Tell Vicki to be outside the clubhouse, & we will pick them up there', I tell Sindi. Sindi's phone rings again & when she hangs up she says 'Paula wants to see you & say hello', so I respond 'oh, that's nice of her, let me put on some lipstick'. We pull into the parking lot, park, & out comes Vicki to greet us........'Oh, Vicki, I love your top' says I. 'Thanks Mom, she replies as we head for the Clubhouse. As we enter the building I see Brittany & Jeff with a video recorder & she is hollering 'Haaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy' & I holler 'Haaayyyyyy' back, still not registering what is going on. I turn & look & see all these Martin's hollering something, AND THEN I SEE MY TWO TWIN NIECES from Texas...my brother eddie & his wife diane.................That is when I realized what was going on. I Just lost it @that point! I just broke down and bawled & bawled the UGLY CRY! When I got my senses controlled, I saw all my old friends & family around me! Doris & all her girls, Anthony Cable, Katy, It was wonderful. THEN, another surprise! I turned and looked @this person, and it took me a minute to figure out who he was...It was Skip Mc Casland, my first Apartment management boss from 1969! We had a great reunion!

Then came a wonderful video put together by Vicki, & Sindi's son Morgan. It was the best gathering ever. I have watched the video every day since then. At the end it says HAPPY BIRTHDAY. I told Vicki she could use the same vidio @my funeral..........just remove 'happy birthday' & replace it with 'Come Up & See Me Sometime !

Pray for Gerald

A couple of days ago, I went to pick up my ex-husband for an appointment @ the OU Physicians building. It was for a radiation therepy (urology). When I arrived @his home, it was an awful awakening on my part. He was totatly naked, & took him about 10 minutes to open the door. I was in shock to see how much weight he had lost in the past week, let alone how his body looked like a skeleton. I knew he had lost a lot of weight, but never expected to see what I saw. I just cried. I had been seeing him every week for months, but had not seen him naked in a couple years. He could barely walk on this day. It was absoulty astounding, and I can not remove the vision from my mind. He is in the VA hospital as I write, and I think he will never leave there this time. He has several liesions on his lungs, sore to touch (his entire body), and is terminal. Depending on the type & strength of pain medication, he still has his sound mind.

I fell madly in love with this man in 1958, and thru all our trials and tribulatons, I have a love for him still. .........

ADDRESS BOOK FOUND

I arrived back from South Dakota more than a couple of weeks ago. A few days ago (like a week or so), I decided to call someone....looked for my address book, to no avail.

Where in the hell is my address book? I looked & looked. I had remembered seeing it after our trip, OR, did I? Is Alzheimer's creeping in? NO, surely not! I checked out every place possible place that Miss Rileigh Shea could have possibly put it. Finally, yesterday, I showed her a piece of luggage that had the same design. 'Rileigh, see this luggage, it has a map on it Did you take my 'book' with a map & hide it? No, Taotao, I don't take your book'.......okay, so, never mind. Yesterday she comes into my office with a Rand McNally Atlas.........'Taotao, here is your map book'..........now, how smart is that!? Finally, I alerted my sister in South Dakota...did I leave it there? I alerted my niece that drove us to South Dakota, did I leave it in her van?....Nope & Nope. Today Lauren came down for a visit. I had made some 'peanut butter candy balls', and she picked up a couple, dropping one behind the couch cushion. 'Lauren, get that candy you dropped, it will cause ants', I screamed! 'Don't worry, taotao, I'm getting it'...........Low & Behold, she pulled out 'MY ADDRESS BOOK!...........see!

REVERSED MORTGAGE, OR NOT?

About a week or so ago, I was thinking about doing a 'reversed mortgage' on my home. It could really put a lot of cash in my much needed pocket. I contacted two or three reverse mortgage companies, and, Oh My God, they're mostly worse than used car salesmen! I was BOMBARDED all week, well, this is Wednesday, but I was overwhelmed with calls solidly for the past three days! Some were nice & professional, some pushy, & some absolute dicks! I have committed to a company with whom I feel comfortable. I am feeling positive about my decision. Maybe now I will travel more, or not. Maybe I'll just fill my propane tank and 'chill'. Nice to have an option.

DO THESE PANTS MAKE ME LOOK FAT?

Nothing really much to say about this except from left to right is pegge, barbara & me. Pegge has passed away since this photo, but mine & barbara's asses look about the same......as she says, we're a little broad across the beam!

Vicki has had lap band surgery & is looking very well and dwindling way down. Sindi & I are thinking about doing the same, & need Barbara down here to do the deed with us.

EVER BEEN TO THE DOLLAR STORE?

Today was my first trip to 'The Dollar Store'. What a treat! Everything in the store is one dollar. I came out with three picture frames, three halogen light bulbs, & a beautiful star shaped deep dish to hold candy. Seven dollars well spent! I could'nt beleive it. They have everything under the sun. Can't wait to go back when I have an extra fifty to spend! They even have name brand stuff.........just need to know where to go, sometimes.

OH, MOM, THIS WILL MAKE YOU LOOK 10 YEARS YOUNGER

Lauren comes over yesterday and announces she is getting a haircut....just a little off the ends...& some dark highlights. 'Great', says I. 'What time is your appointment'? She told me it was @seven o'clock. My first thought was 'John is off tonite, so he will probably watch Rileigh Shea'.

Vicki is usually home from work around 5:30, so when it got close to 6:00, I asked Lauren if she had heard from her mother. Yes she had. 'But taotao, you know when I said my appointment was @7:00'? 'Yes'? 'Well, it IS @seven, but my Mom is doing my hair, she is @the beauty supply place getting the stuff & will be here soon'. I knew by her tone & body language that meant my kitchen was soon to be our own private little beauty shop. 'And, taotao, Mom & I were thinkin that there would be enuf hair color left over, we could color your hair too, if you want to'. Oh My God! they're talking about me behind my back, and think I look OLD & HAGGARD! 'Lauren, I thought y'all liked my silvery hair, you've always said........'we do like your silvery hair, taotao, we're just sayin....you might like a change' 'Well, you're probably right, a change may do me good'.

Wondering again what brought on their conversation about making my hair dark? Maybe it's because a week or so ago, I had Sindi glue individual eyelashes on me like she always did in the '80's. They were wonderful, looked very natural, and lasted a long time. When she arrived @my house that Sunday, she found not only the 'single' individual lash, but a new lash we had not seen....it was individual but flared out. So, she mixed them.......Well, let me tell you, Carol Channing had nothing on me! Of course, I exagerate..but next time, I'll stick to the singles.

Lauren gets to be first while Rileigh drags out my dish towels for me to make her a cape & hood, then gets a baggie for her basket. She is Little Red Riding Hood & I'm The Big Bad Wolf......we play this @least once a day, but I get to do it twice this day! :-) While Lauren is washing her hair, I'm already on the stool for my application. I am now thinking that I have lived with this silvery hair for three or four years now......so, don't go into shock, scream, or start bawling when you look in the mirror. 'Oh, I don't know about this, Vicki'. 'What's to worry, you will look ten years younger when I am finished' she boasts.

Well, I didn't even need a mirror. As soon as Lauren washed & towel dried my hair, they both howled and screamed with laughter! Rileigh just looked on in horror.

Ten years younger MY ASS. I look like all those seventy and eighty year old filipino people on Guam. They all dye their hair jet black until their dying day...each & everyone of them! Vicki was calling me Elvis, but the vision of Korea's Kim Jong Il kept creeping into my mind.

PATRIOTISM WAS ALIVE @ MOORE WARREN THEATER JULY 4TH

My niece Sindi and I had a late lunch yesterday (July 4th) and decided to take in a movie, rather watch fireworks in the rain. A storm was brewing and headed our way. Public Enemies was a good choice. I loved the soundtrack & classic automobiles as much as the script.

I must post what a heart warming surprise Bill Warren had for all his patrons prior to showtime. This booming voice came over the sound system (same booming voice they always have for announcements) acknowledging the Birth of Our Country, This Great Land of America. There was the recitation of 'The Ragged Old Flag' by Johnny Cash, followed by 'The Pledge of Allegiance' by The Mormon Tabernacle Choir. Everyone jumped to their feet @ first note.

I've been concerned with our country's lack of patriotism, but Bill Warren restored my hope.

If you don't have a Warren Theater in your neighborhood, you're absolutely missing out! They are Art Deco design with forty foot ceilings etc, etc......check out www.warrentheatres.com

PAGE 449

Alcoholics Anonymous has a Big Book for reference, for comfort, for sanity, to pick up and read any time for whatever reason, in order to help you stay sober one day at a time.

On page 449 it reads:

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation--some fact of my life--unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and my attitudes.

Well hell, what a concept. I was reminded of page 449 yesterday. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the WORLD, as on what needs to be changed in ME AND MY ATTITUDES.

ACCEPTANCE IS THE KEY. Thank you my friend, of the reminder........I needed it!

SO GLAD TO BE HOME!

Well, the trip to South Dakota was not a very good experience for my fourteen year old grand daughter, and, not much better for her Taotao. Maybe we had to many 'expectations'. The car travel 'up north' was fun. We made many stops & our driver (Sindi) was a great companion. Lauren & her cousin Taylor met for the first time. Lauren is 14, a soccer enthusiast, and all about sports. Taylor is 15, and a girly girly, and all about make up & all that implys. The first 500 miles, they were in seperate seats & quiet. The second 500 miles, they bonded somewhat. We spent our first nite in the Black Hills & the next day was a great day to explore Mount Rushmore, The Custer State Park, & The Badlands of South Dakota. What a glorious site. They really had a good time @the badlands, and I think they will always remember that experience. We then arrived at my sister's home for a few days. Day one: Sindi's car was in trouble & needed attention. (sent to the garage). I felt stranded at that point....

I wanted to show my granddaughter so many things, but transportation was limited. My Sister had a house full of company that weekend (Fathers Day) and she was tired. Then we arrived. I think we were too much for her. She did entertain us. We played scrabble (one of her favorite games), not mine, by the way....she always beats me....but my grand daughter likes the game.

Our trip south was uneventful. Lots of stops, lots of drinks & chips, lots of silence, and lots of Wah Hoo's when we reached the Oklahoma Border.......You have to be an OKIE to understand reaching the Oklahoma State Line.........................

HEAD'N FOR THE HILLS....THE BLACK HILLS

Sixteen hours ago, sitting @my computer, I couldn't get in a standing position. I had no hope of making my long planned trip to South Dakota on friday morning, but oh, the miracle of medicine!

About a week ago I was walking across the room & felt a little twinge in my lower back...just one of those 'gotcha' pricks. Hmmmm? what was that all about? Sunday morning, while bent over putting lotion on my feet, I feel it again as I was straightening up. Vicki comes over monday evening & I tell her I've been getting a little hitch in my getalong for a few days. 'Where does it hurt mom'? 'right here', showing her the location. 'Oh, I know, I get those every once in a while too' she tells me. Tuesday I'm reaching for a cookbook on top of my refridgerator and let out this loud grunt and a lot of #&!*%@&#. 'What happened Taotao'? says Lauren......'oh, nothing, a pain just shot thru my back, I'm okay'. Yesterday (wednesday) I could tell all was not right with the world & taotao when it was time to roll out of bed.....and, I mean ROLL. I could not stand erect for a few minutes. Lauren & Rileigh arrive & she offers to go to her house & get me some ibuprofen. My God! I don't even have ibuprofen in my empty medicine cabinet (meaning a corner in my kitchen cabinet IF I did take medication). I take the medication & within thirty minutes, the pain subsides.

Taotao, will you drive me over to my friend Sara's house, we're going to hang out today.....sure. After lunch, I put Rileigh down for her nap around 2:30 & I fall asleep as well. I wake up within thirty minutes to use the bathroom......OUCH! my ibuprofen is wearing off...OUCH, OUCH...I don't think I can get up! I have to get up! I hobble over to a straight back chair @my computer, I'm in severe pain & crying. I have a very high tollerance for pain, folks, so I know I'm in big trouble. I'm sitting with my back to the phone & can't turn around to reach it! Shit!, I can't even take a deep breath. I look down @my feet & legs......oh good, I can move them. I sit here helpless. Miss independant me is helpless! Finally I realize I can use the computer, so I email Papa (John's dad) with a SOS & I forward it on to Sindi, just in case they are on their computers. They were not. I take my stapler & knock the phone out of its stand, so I can reach it & call John to leave a voice mail because I know it's not time for him to get up (works nites). Then I leave a voicemail on Vicki's phone (can't receive phone calls @work), I call Lauren to leave a voice mail...(she usually just text messages)...Of course, I don't know how to do that.....Oh, I know how to type the words, I just don't know how to send them........Then I called Brittany and she saved me. She texted her mother, offered to come over (lives 40 miles away) & she called Jim & Sara (John's folks, who live about 3 miles away). They came over immediately, woke up John, Sara brought more ibuprofen to put in my system so the guys could get me up off the chair. Not a pretty site, guys....

Sara makes some phone calls, Vicki will meet Jim & I at the hospital ER, Sara stays back to watch Rileigh as John has to get ready for work. Jim transports me to a brand new community hospital....I was very impressed with everyone we came in contact with (sorry about the preposition @the end of my sentence, Mrs. Anderson.)

Xrays were taken as well as one of those fifty question history inquiries.....The good Doctor's diagnosis: Arthritis....my #1 & 2 lumbar vertibra are bone to bone. But, he said since I've had no problems with my back since 1995 (when I lived on Guam & was told then that I needed back surgery)is a good sign & the fact that (4) ibuprofen gave me relief earlier in the day was a good sign. So I will make an appointment with my Orthopedic Surgeon & take from there.

The good Doctor said he was prescribing steroids to reduce the inflamation, loritabs for pain, & a muscle relaxer......and, that I should be good to go on that SD trip.....use my own good judgement 'Good judgement' is something new to me...........where was it thirty years ago! I'm anxious to show Lauren Mt. Rushmore, The Badlands, the Corn Palace & the little town where I was raised.

So, the moral of this story: 'Here's Your Sign'

OH MY GOD, JULIE IS THAT YOU?

Had a wonderful surprise @the supermarket today, and no, it wasn't the price of pork. Early this morning I took Gerald for his procedure @the VA hospital. We both left our cell phones home, so I didn't get to meet up with Katy as I usually do. We had a good lunch, then off to the supermarket......no list today, Gerald went in with me & got on one of those driving baskets. We're coming down an isle & as I look up, there is this pretty lady giving me a big grin & stops in her tracks. I could feel a big hug coming my way...'Julie, is that you'? 'Yesssss, fran, it is'. We were both elated to see one another & I had a hundred questions, & got a lot of information in a short time. We will continue on the phone next week.

Julie was around 12 the last time I saw her. Her mother (Mae) worked for me @Railhead as a maid for years.....probably ten at least & I was close to hers & her husband John's family. Mae is from Ireland and all that entails, John is from Oklahoma & all that entails, They were very much in love and it showed. It was nice to see. In fact it was Mae's sister in law who sold me my acreage on Guam. All the years I knew Rosa, I thought she was a Mexican lady until I made the announcement I was moving to Guam & found out she was Chamorro.

Julie informed me that her parents still live in Bethany, (same address), & that her brother, Kevin lost his first wife & is getting married again Saturday, her sister Sheila is coming in from Illinois, & blah, blah, blah........I find it amazing that we could recognize each other twenty-one years down the road. Especially since she was only twelve, and I was a size 10.........oh, ya, now I remember...she did know me as being as fat as I am now, because I was this size from the time she was four to about ten.................

FRUSTRATION with LACK of customer service

I'm getting old and frustrations should be 'few and far between', however, sometimes they are not. Yesterday I was making a 'follow up' phone call for a loan I had applied for about ten days ago. The application said I would get a 'deny or approve' within seventy two hours'. I waited, and waited, to no avail. So yesterday I called them back...'Hello, this is fran king, I applied for a loan........excuse me, Mrs. King, let me transfer you to that department'........Hello, this is Kathy........'oh, hi Kathy, this is fran king, I applied for a loan about ten days ago & someone was supposed to get back to me in 72 hours... is the loan for the mortgage, automobile, or personal department? says Kathy'....I tell her, 'one moment please,...'what is your SS#' ? I tell her. 'OK, Mrs. King, I will transfer you to Albert, he has your file, & will be able to help you'. 'Thanks'. 'Hello, this is Albert (chomp, chomp, chomp) can I help you'? 'Yes, this is fran king, & blah blah blah, 'excuse me, (chomp chomp) what is your SS#'? I repeat it again. 'Well, let me see, chitch ta chitch ta chitch ta chitch.......'oh ya, here it is', chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp...'didn't I send you an email''? 'No, I haven't heard from anyone' says I, and wanted to scream in the phone 'Don't you get an effing lunch break'? 'Oh, it's been transferred to so & so department, we will get back with you in a couple of days, chomp, chomp, chitch ta chitch ta chitch'! 'Thanks for calling SOB BANK'. What in the world has happened to CUSTOMER SERVICE? There is none. To make matters worse: today I needed to mail in the second half of my property taxes & decided to go to the Post Office to send them off as I did not have a stamp, (BECAUSE I pay all my bills online) I paid the first half of my property taxes ONLINE 12/31/08, but when I tried to pay the second half(+ interest cuz I'm late) I was informed that I could NOT. 'Why is that? I do not understand, if I can pay the first half, or pay IN FULL on 12/31, then why can't I pay the second half online'? says I. "Because that's OUR RULES" says she........OMG, that explains everything! So I drive over to the P.O. (approximately four miles) & BELIEVE THIS OR NOT... our POST OFFICE DOES NOT HAVE A STAMP MACHINE!........A POST OFFICE WITHOUT A STAMP MACHINE, CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? ..SHIT! I ain't EVEN believing this.........maybe it's a PODUNK, OKLAHOMA thang........

OK, I've Fought The Fight..And Gave In Today

Nap: A brief sleep, often during the day, to be unaware of imminent danger or trouble. Says Webster. I have often needed a nap, but would not succumb. It is a practice of old people, and I do not want to admit I'm getting OLD! Admit or not, it is glaring me in the face. Everyday, for months, the NAP has been beckoning me, noooooooo, I won't go.

Today, as most mornings, I awake around six o'clock. (Think this is a built in alarm from my fifty years of being in the workforce.) Sometimes I just roll over and sleep another hour or so, but not today. I make my usual pot of strong ass coffee and troll the internet. I have several blogs I follow, so I catch up on them. Go out and water my plants...make breakfast, and watch The View.

Lauren is out of school, so I ask her to go with me to pick up our 'repaired two wheeler weed eater'. We return around 2:00. I am getting sleepy, but fight it until 4:00, then think 'what the hell is up with this........go lay down'...I did, & when I woke up @5:30 I felt great. Got out the mower & manicured my acre for an hour or so. It was a great refreshing time out there on that mower......I think it was the NAP that did it. Maybe I will try it again.

Visited 'Papa King' Today

Vicki, Rileigh Shea, & I went to visit Papa King today. It breaks my heart to see him regularly losing weight & getting more frail each time I see him. He has always had a stocky build, and wore it well. A very good looking man. He is on his way to being 73 in October. We had a very nice visit, he had been in his yard preparing a 'canna bed' I think he said he had 50 bulbs to plant.....that's a lot of canna's, I'm a thinkin. I am going back in the morning to take him grocery shopping.........I will take his 'list' and he will wait in the car, as usual.........that's the drill. I am glad that I can do 'this chore' for him. One day I may be in the same dependable situation. Oh, Lord God, I can not even put that picture in my mind. I think I'll be one of those people that live well into the eighties & go out with a bang....do you hear me, dear Lord..........Please & Thanks, as barbara says........

A Gardener, I Am Not!

I have been spoiled most of my adult life when it comes to yard work and home maintenance. I do not like being 'responsible' for either one. Since retiring and moving to the countryside, both issues are a pain in my ass. Being in Property Management afforded me the opportunity and LUXURY of sending my 'maintenance men' to my home and 'fix' whatever was broken, or, manicure my lawn and flower gardens, at a whim. The same continued when I moved to Guam, and, again when I continued to manage The Lodge @Tiburon'. Now, it is a few years later, and here I am, sitting on two acres.........with no maintenance man to direct, no husband to help, no significant other, just me..........and, my Rileigh Shea! She loves to 'help her taotao out in the yard'. She will do anything to be outdoors. Today we planted a container of 'perennial wild flowers'....love, love, love wildflowers.....reminds me of living on the farm & going out into the pasture on summer days to pick 'bluebells', and other assorted wildflowers......stayed gone for hours.

I have planted a few beautiful trees in the past couple of weeks......a couple of huge weeping willows, a plum, and a 12' fountain cherry......watering, is another fun chore.............my garden hose won't reach one of them, so, it is a big deal for Rileigh to fill my pail over & over in order to water this tree. Maintenance Men, where are you? Speaking of maintenance men, my 'head maintenance man' from the Tiburon Lodge called me today to say 'hello', and pass along good thoughts'....thanks, Armando. Employment in Glorious California is not looking so glorious. He has job security, but said it is getting noticeably worse in his area. I had no answers for him. I have few for myself. This recession is pretty scary. Where is my BIG Stimulous Check!

Hate it when 'habitual' kicks in

We are all creatures of habit, all of us. I went to visit my best friend this weekend. We were having a drink out on her deck, and discussing all that needed to be discussed between us. She is still in 'The Work Force', and I am not, so I enjoy her tales of war, err, work........ Friday is 'casual dress day' at her place of employment, and evidently my friend wears the same casual pants each Friday. I don't think she was aware of her habit, (I know she wasn't) until a casual function was on the horizon, and a co-worker exclaimed.......'just come in your 'friday pants'..........see how we are.........and are not aware that no one else notices?
THEY NOTICE!

What is this severe throbbing @the end of my legs?

Oh, that........that would be my feet. Having had the experience of shopping with my daughter since she was a teenager, you would think I would have learned my lesson by now, some thirty plus years later. But nooooooooo, I'm a slow learner.

Vick's sister in law, Shelly, is getting married June 14th, and it is a big deal in the Martin household. Shelly waited a long time to find her true love. The whole family will dress in Shelly's 'colors', and yesterday was the outing to find a dress for my thirteen year old granddaughter, Lauren. She is a tomboy and has been heavy into soccer since she was a small child. Her interests now include track and basketball. She is NOT into dresses, so this was reason enuf to tag along on this excursion. I bought her a beautiful crimson dress when she was five and was in her Christmas program. I doubt that she has worn a dress since then. Kinda like her taotao, I haven't worn a dress since 1983.

So, we head out around 2:30, with Rileigh Shea in tow, (she's three). Yes, she IS THREE, and that is about all I need to say about that. The first store was a total flop. I think the realization of actually wearing a dress was soaking in with Lauren. She turned her nose up at all suggestions, may have tried one on....and, looking @dress shoes was a whole other issue. And, let the games begin with Rileigh and taotao playing 'hide & seek' under the racks of clothing! Well, I'm not really playing, more like chasing, and scolding. I'm already getting a 'twitch', and realizing this was going to be a stressful outing, to say the least. Nothing there, so on to our second store, a small boutique. Lauren finds a dress in the right color, and kinda likes it, looks at me & says 'okay, taotao, I think we're done...this one is okay...c'mon, Mom, lets take this one'. But the shopper Vicki is, thinks we need the clerk to hold it for us while we check out yet another store.......off we go to our third department store. Oh My God!, it was like walking into a huge garage sale as far as I was concerned (Kohls). By the time we leave there without even finding a single garment to suit Lauren, it must be around six o'clock. Next stop is Gordmans department store & it was worse than Kohls. Then on to a shoe store........had good luck & found a cute pair of black patten leather flats that Lauren agreed to wear, so, back to our boutique. I'm thinking this is going to be quick because the clerk has our dress on hold. Wrong! Vicki & Lauren decide to check out the casual sports clothing. My swollen feet are hurting and, Rileigh is getting more out of control, so she & I go outside for fresh air. After thirty minutes or so of us 'playing' outside, I hear a horn honk, and it's Vicki & Lauren. I hobble to the curb & climb in. 'Mother, are your knees hurting'? (I had two knee replacements done four years ago). 'No, my knees are in great shape, but my feet & ankles are turning numb!', says I. Since being retired, I have been super lazy in the exercise department, and boy that laziness was rearing its ugly head yesterday. 'Are you hungry? I thought we would stop & get something to eat'. 'Well, yes, as a matter of fact I am, I skipped breakfast for a pot of strong ass coffee, so then I wasn't hungry by lunch time'

Off to the Deli we go and order a great meal. Miss Rileigh Shea is getting acquainted with all the customers in our area, 'hi, what's you name? I Rileigh Shea Maatin' etcetera, etcetera. It felt very good to sit for a spell & enjoy our good food.

We leave the Deli, and by now it has to be around seven thirty or eight o'clock. We are driving along and when I recognize a street sign, I'm thinking 'this is not the way home, we're going south, not west'. 'Vicki, are we going south to Norman'? 'Yes, Mother, we're on our way to Dillards, Lauren wants some 'Ed Hardy' perfume' 'You have got to be shit'in me......look @the time'! 'Oh, calm down, Mother, it's good for you to get out once in a while'.........We're in Dillards trying on more clothes..this time for Vicki. Finally I insist Lauren purchase her perfume so we can leave.........'the cashier's are counting out their cash registers for Christ's sake'.........let's go!....Rileigh is bugging me to take her back to the 'gum ball' machine where we stopped when we first arrived....'taotao, you got more money? Bebe want's more gum'.....Vicki & Lauren are laughing at me for my impatience, & I am telling them 'this is it...never invite me on another shopping trip'! We finally leave the store (have to, it's closing time)..........but it's not the end, we stop at McDonalds for McCafe for us & John & ice cream cones for Lauren & Rileigh........and, finally head home.

I drag my crippled swollen feet into the house, It is 10:05! Over seven hours of walking around department stores! I had stripped my bed & washed my sheets before leaving on our excursion, my mattress pad & un-pillowcased pillows were waiting. I didn't even bother to make my bed, I just crawled in. It was wonderful just to get off my aching feet. Then the McCafe coffee started to 'kick in'. I had to hobble to the bathroom every hour or so until three o'clock.

I love you, my darling daughter, but please do not invite me on another shopping trip for at least six months. I promise I will get out more, but in my own fashion........your muete

Two Shorts and One Long

Well, since I am on the topic my home town of Reliance, South Dakota, I am having fond memories of 'how it was waaay back then', circa 1945. I am remembering when Mama & Daddy first moved to the farm that is forever imprinted into my mind. It was three miles south of town. I am thinking they had (two) already constructed shells put in place..(thinking graneries), both positioned into a short 'T' shape. I am remembering 'Junior Schelle and Russell Black' coming out during the summertime to help Daddy construct a house from these two buildings. There was no plumbing to be concerned with, nor electricity. We had an 'outhouse' for a toilet, and lamps to give us lighting during the evenings and nite time. We were very happy and content. In our winter time, we sometimes placed food in snowbanks. We used an 'ice box', where we placed a huge block of ice into it's compartment, to keep food 'cool'...hence, the icebox. I can't remember the kitchen stove, it must have been wood burning, or possibly propane gas. We had one heating stove in our living room. Our humble home consisted of a kitchen, living room & two bedrooms, probably no more than eight or nine hundred square feet, and by the middle of the decade, they had four girls. We had a community telephone line with an 'operator'. All calls went thru this operator. We were on a 'country line'. Our signal was : two short rings & one long ring. (that's when we knew it was for our house), but, being on a country line meant that everyone else on this line could 'listen in' to all conversations. So, this was a good 'gossip' tool. And, believe me!, Everyone listened in.

I remember Mama getting her 'Singer sewing machine' while we lived there, (I have it @my home today) & remember that she and about three other ladies traveled to Mitchell, SD (which was 80 or 90 miles away) periodically to 'take sewing & tayloring' lessons. Irene Cullen was one of the ladies. Mama turned out to be a wonderful seamstress. She made all of our clothes, including our coats, & Daddy's suits. She sewed most of her life. I loved my Mama unconditionally all of her life, no matter how many up's & down's we encountered. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY, MAMA.

barbara, you are allowed to make any corrections to 'my memory'.......I know yours is better than mine.

Reliancehigh.com

About three months ago, my sister barbara coerced me into helping her create a 'highschool website'. Sounded like a 'good idea', so, I agreed to help to put one together for our little town of Reliance, South Dakota. We now have the website up and running, and, if I have to say so myself, it looks pretty damn good. The only problem is, is that not that many people have actually 'signed up'. Oh, we have hundreds of 'looky lou's', but only a few actually getting involved. No one presently living in our 'old home town' has logged on. I have a feeling it may have something to do with a negative letter I wrote to the 'Town Board' after visiting a reunion in the summer of 2008.

My cousin, my sisters & I were making our 'around town & country drive', doing the 'remember when thing' and making our personal comments about what we were seeing. My cousin goes, 'we all need to write a letter to the town board about the condition of Reliance'. We all agree, and when I returned to Oklahoma, I fire off my letter. As it turns out, I am the ONLY ONE to do so. I'm certain I offended the whole town. I hope I am not Tarred and Feathered the next time I return, or barred from the next reunion. I just have not learned the meaning of 'Diplomacy' in all my years.

Forgive me Father, for I have sinned..........................once again. Reliance, forgive me.

Death's Door and Heaven's Gate

I received disturbing news today from my dear friend, Katy. She has been the caretaker for her sister for the past several years, because she has COPD, and other related illness'. Now she is in a downward spiral with her health, has become very thin and frail, however, I know she has a wonderful relationship with God Almighty. Truth known, Trela is probably more comfortable with her situation than Katy is. Isn't it amazing how the person that is about to leave this earth, is more at peace with their departure, than the people 'left behind'. The Hospice nurses have said her sister seems to be giving up', and, I say, why not give up, look what she has to look forward to in God's Glorious Kingdom! I was at death's door when I was quite young. I had a heart attack & was rushed to the hospital. My daughter was only four years old. As I lay in intensive care, hooked up to a monitor, I hear this noise, and when I look up at the monitor and see the flat line. I remember my ONLY thought was 'Oh, it is true, your heart stops before your brain'....Hail Mary full of Grace.......I had no fear of dying, my only concern was getting to Heaven. May God Bless and comfort both of my friends.

Common Sense Sometimes Just Disappears

Just sent Sindi a note inquiring about her 49th birthday that just passed last week, and had a flashback to my 49th.

Looking back, who was that dumbass? At the time, I had fallen head over heels in love with a Chamoru (native of guam) a year or so before my 49th. He was my Julio Iglesias, & I was his Queen of effing Sheba. After his many trips to Oklahoma, and my many trips to Micronesia, I made this brilliant decision (with plenty of persuasion on his part), to re-locate to this tiny island in the middle of the Pacific. Throwing caution to the wind, leaving a great job I'd held for nearly 15 years, my beautiful home, my adult daughter, friends, and all that was familiar, my mind was made up. In preparation, I attended & graduated from a local Travel Agent's School, took Japanese lessons, pulled the monies from my 401K, and purchased my airfare one month after turning 49.

I received a lot of advice from friends, some positive, some negative, and some blatantly stating 'You have lost your ever lovin mind'! Turns out they were all right. There I was, very pretty, very thin, and, very stoooopid, only I didn't recognize the stupid part at the time.

Regrets? yes, some. Amends? yes, I made several. Happy times? about 75/25.

I stayed eleven years and loved the island life, never got 'rock fever', and would still be there if it was just a little closer. Julio & I went our separate ways, but he will never leave my heart, which may cause some to wonder about my ever lovin mind, however, I HAVE made some strides in the common sense department....moshi, moshi, & domo arrigato,Ohioyu, & konichiwa is about all the Japanese I remember, but my geography & airport destination icons are still intact. sayonara, Julio ni guahan

VA Hospital & Grocery shopping

OK, today was my ex-husband's day @ the VA hospital, and then on to our six week 'grocery shopping' trip.........meaning I shop according to his 'list', including exact amounts & exact brands..do not waiver from the list...OMG, this is an adventure to say the least. Today, we are going to a 'store' we have never been to before......A Latino Store with a Grand Opening Sale! I swear to GOD!, I was in there for over two hours.........BUT, I came out with TWO shopping carts of food, and spent $102.00! He actually purchased over 40# of meat in the deal.........I am not kidding, folks. It was unreal. Mounds & mounds of fresh fruit & veggies, and a variety of canned goods & dried goods.....UNBELIEVABLE.............WalMart.........you stink

Wait, Weight, What's you're problem....

Well, the problem is, is everything in my life is in a wait and weight mode. My daughter, Vicki had lap band surgery a few months ago. Like, six months ago. She has lost 45 pounds to date....kinda slow, but that is how she wants to lose her weight. Soooo, Miss Me is thinking, 'boy, this is really a slow process', however, miss me has probably gained five pounds since her surgery :-) She is really showing her efforts at this writing. She has probably dropped MAJOR sizes in her clothing So, now I am envious! Sunday morning I started this big time low carb diet...I know it really works, cuz I've seen it happen in other people. Persistance is the game, and I have to get creative in my menu in order to make it through a few months. Being fat is such a bitch.............

Why do I feel guilty for sleeping late....& everything else?

It's 8:45 saturday morning & my phone is ringing....been awake, but still dozing. rrrrring, rrrring......(where's my damn teeth?) oh, here they are, under my pillow. 'Uh, hello'. 'Mother, are you still asleep'? 'No', my voice answers sounding like a foghorn...'you are too' says my daughter, laughing. 'Do you have any good coffee, (meaning Starbucks) all we have is '8 o'clock' 'sorry, that is all I have too'. Then I start to justify why it took me so long to answer.......does she even care if I am sleeping or not? No. It's me & my mind feeling guilty for still being in bed. I don't know why I think I'm supposed to be up & productive. What is up with that? I'm nearly seventy, retired, and have no one to answer to, yet I'm feeling guilty. Does Medicare pay for therapy?

My best friend Katy

Some days are good, and some, are just better....Today was one of those 'just better' days. My best friend in this world came to visit, and it was a great day. She is Katy, we have been friends since probably around 1980. We know the 'in's & out's' of each other, and have an acceptance of one other including all our warts. Warts are hard to accept for some people, but not us. We have no expectations. It's nice to have someone to speak with openly.......and take down your Christmas lights that are dangling from the rooftop in April.

I love you, Katy, warts or not.......fran

I'm a Great Grandmother

I just became a great grandmother. Sara Presley Wells was born @1:37pm, Monday, March 30th. She is a beautiful, healthy girl weighing in @7lbs 5oz, & is 19 &1/2 inches long, with white blond hair. After I turned 40 I started thinking about becoming a grandmother, but being a great grandmother never really entered my mind. No, it doesn't make me feel any older. In fact, in my case, nothing really makes 'me feel any older'. The years keep adding on, but I feel the same. Well.......until I look in a mirror, and see The Big Fat Truth Looking Back At Me!

Milk is all I needed

Saturday nite I decided to fry up some chicken nuggets with cream gravy. No milk.....no problem, Braums ice cream store is only a mile or so away, I'll make a quick trip. While I'm in there passing all the ice cream, I take a gander..oh look, they have all new eye catching packaging, so I pick up one of my favorites (black cherry amaretto yogurt), grab some orange juice & proceed to check out. I have a cold & started coughing. The cashier smiles sympathizingly. 'Sounds like you have a bad cold', 'yes, I sure do', says I smiling. ' I had one too, ended up going to the emergency room @ 3 A.M. in the morning' (love it when someone uses 'A.M'.in the morning...aren't they the same?) She continues, 'I was @the emergency room for over two hours & the doctor prescribes this cough syrup. I went to walmart to get the prescription filled & do you know how much they wanted for that cough syrup? 'Hunh Uh'? '$38.00'! I just told them I didn't want it & went & got some stuff off the shelf'. 'My husband died last year, but if he was still alive, he would'nt have let me get by with doing that'. (I'm still smiling and acting interested in her tale) 'Ya, he was a real stickler when it came to following Doctor's orders........my daughter is the same way, so I didn't even tell her I was going to the emergency room', 'she woulda had a fit' she continued. I stopped smiling...'excuse me, did you give me a receipt'? 'Oh, honey, I'm sorry, here it is.....I was just telling my friend Shirley.......'Hell, for $38.00, I coulda got a good bottle of whiskey'! 'Yes, I'm sure you could have', I'm agreeing as I make my exit. I get to the car & realize I forgot my milk, but there is no way in hell I'm going back in there. I stop @the Conoco across the street & get A pack of cigarettes, A Sunday paper, & a 1/2 gallon of milk. $10.83! ......cigarettes have gone from $3.85 to $5.50 a pack in one week, & the Sunday paper has gone from $1.50 to $2.00 in the past week.. My yogurt was the same price in its cute new packaging, but noticed when I got home it read: 3 pints, (not 1/2 gallon) I keep saying I have to stop smoking even tho a pack lasts me a couple of days. Nicotine patches have probably climbed to a hundred dollars a box by now.

Stallman Family Reunion, 2010

Okay, barbara & our cousin mary ann, are planning a Stallman family reunion, June, 2010 in Reliance, South Dakota. It's been in the works for over a year or so, but now the pressure is on. barbara has a wonderful 'stallman website', with all our history from kingdom come. I am absolutely amazed at all the hours & hours of work she has done with our website. It would be a disgrace not to show up and participate. We are all encouraged to write about our lives, trials & tribulations, & include pictures, or not. As for me & my daughter, and her family, we will most certainly be there. If my ex husband, gerald, thinks he can make the trip, he can be there also. I'm updating my information on her website as I write.....thanks, barbara, for all the extensive, investigative work you do. Barbara keeps up with a lot of our relatives, especially those in Minnesota & Iowa. I could probably brush shoulders with most of them & not know if he or she is related......pretty sad, but true.

To Be Or Not To Be

Are you computer literate? For me....ya, just a little bit...............but for some folks in my hometown.....NOT! My niece Sindi Speck is 'on fire' to create a Reliance Highschool Alumni webpage, designed from the same format as her Highschool Alumni in Duchnese, Utah. It is a wonderful, informative, personal (as much as you want to reveal about yourself) and very interesting to other graduates (or not). My sister, barbara suggested it to some people in the alumni association, and others not associated with the alumni, in my hometown, only to be discarded, to absolute excitement. She discovered most of the people she encountered did not EVEN have a computer. WHAT??? You can not be serious! I am in absolute shock over this declaration. Anyway, it is true, and it does not matter. Barbara, Sindi, & I are going through with this website and it will be a wonderful experience for everyone. I think it will be exciting to see where people are now and what is going on in their life. You can reveal as much information and photo's as you like.

My Rileigh Shea, Happy Birthday !!!

Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday, Rileigh Shea, Happy Birthday to you ! Your taotao loves you all the way to the moon! You are three today (february 28th), and we will celebrate with a 'doggy cake' and go to 'chucky cheese', as we did with lauren when she was your age. Only Lauren was afraid of 'chucky cheese'.........I love you, your taotao

With A Song In Her Heart

My phone rang this afternoon, and on the line was my niece, Sindi. She moved back to Oklahoma in September,'08 after several years absence. She is highly educated, has many accomplishments, & was hired with her company within two weeks of her arrival. She has had positive & negative concerns with her employer since she 'signed on', however, today, with the new stimulous package in effect, she now has an opportunity to actualy help people that her job was intended. I think from hearing her positive voice today, she will be very happy in her position. I am happy that she is happy....It's a good day.

Stallman Geneology

I'm getting new emails often from sissy barbara, showing me what she has done to 'update' her page on the Stallman Family History Page. She has done a wonderful job on her page........I have done nothing. I think she is trying to 'prod' me along......I MUST get busy! She & Marianne are planning this BIG FAMILY REUNION, and, I am looking forward to it. The last big one I remember was 1994. IT WAS HUGE! Vicki told me tonite that she & John, lauren & rileigh are planning a great vacation around the reunion, as I'm sure many other families are. So, I promise to 'get with it' and produce great information & pictures on 'my page'.....I'm just LAZY

The Dash

I received an email from Sara yesterday..(my daughter's Mother in Law) It is a poem from Linda Ellis titled 'The Dash'....I can't copy & paste it, but everyone should read it. I would like to think that 'my dash' means something to various people. I know in my heart that it does to some.

In retrospect, I have reflected on many dashes in certain people. It is a good thing to ponder.

Procrastination and Patience

I've always been heavy in the procrastination department, and quite light in the patience area.... but gradually learning my lessons in both. Oh, it's hard to teach old dogs new tricks!

Yesterday was our 'every six week's appointment' @ the VA hospital for gerald, (my ex-husband). I always have a talk with myself on the way to pick him up.......'now just remember, frances, this is going to be whatever it's going to be, it's the VA hospital after all'. 'You won't find a parking spot quickly, radiology won't call gerald's name until at least thirty or forty minutes after his scheduled appointment'....and then there is the possibility his blood work will not 'be up to par', and they may cancel his procedure.....this usually happens after we have been sitting around for at least three hours.......or, an emergency situation could pop up at any given moment, pushing his procedure back another couple of hours. So yesterday his appointment was scheduled @9:30. It is usually @8:00, but gerald moved it up in case we encountered bad weather. So great, this will give me time to run by the DMV & renew my EXPIRED drivers license! I needed to get that taken care of so I could replace my EXPIRED license plate. Both were supposed to be renewed by January 31. The DMV in my area opened at 7AM.......I arrive @ 7:30 (that gives me at least an hour to take care of business). I open the door & see about 80 people sitting & standing in line. Good God, this many people @this time of day? The sign inside the door reads: If you want to re-test....go to the re-test line, If you want a driving test, go to the drive line, all others, take a number. So, I walk past four people in front of me waiting to see the lady @the desk & reach for a number. 'excuse me, you can't take a number, you have to get back in line' says the lady. 'Oh, sorry...I thought the sign said'.......'no ma'am, get back in line'. So I did as I was told, & didn't even get huffy. It's my turn. 'I need your birth certificate & drivers license'. No problem, & she does the paper work & hands me my number...190. I take my seat & look up as a buzzer goes off & see the illuminated sign showing the next number in line: 153! I sit there until 8:10 & the new number flashing is now 161. Never mind, I'll just to come back later this afternoon. The lady takes my number back & tells me to keep my paper work & bring it back with me.

I pick gerald up @9:00 & we head for the hospital, drop him @the door & start my adventure to find a place to park. Had a lucky day, it only took about ten or fifteen minutes of inching my way thru the maze of automobiles to find a spot. We wait our normal thirty, forty minutes to have his blood drawn, go to the second floor to check in. The check in lady announces 'Mr. King is here.....Oh, okay.....sorry, Mr. King, there has been an emergency, it will be a couple of hours before we can get to you, or you can re-schedule'. 'No, I don't want to re-schedule', says gerald. So, okay, we have a couple hours to kill, it's around eleven, we'll run some errands....... I still have not lost my cool. We go by the antique shop and he places all the pocket watches he brought along earlier, we drive over to his bank & take care of business there. We've killed an hour and a half, time to go back to the hospital. They are ready and waiting on him. His surgical procedure takes an hour and a half, so I call my bff, Katy (who works across the street), we meet & spend an hour together 'catching up', laughing hysterically @ ourselves. It's now time to pick up 'woozy gerald', and drop by the super market for his list of items, take him home & visit for awhile. By the time I head for home, it's around 5:30. He thanks me again for taking him to these appointments. It is not a problem, and we always enjoy each other's company, and 'remembering our good times', and discussing current events.

So, I did quite well yesterday, no pissy moments at all. This morning I get up @5:30 so I have plenty of time to get to the DMV early. I arrive shortly after seven, show my paper work from yesterday. I get my number...249...look @the screen & it shows 230 is next in line. How can so many people be in front of me this early? 'Well, ma'am, they start lining up outside by 5:30 every morning'.......'Oh'. At 8:35 my number is called. I have all my documents out & step up to the counter. 'Mrs. King, you are a speeder!' says the Officer as he swivels the computer monitor my direction. 'Yes, I know I am', says I....'you have a full page of citations, in fact, you have a page & a half documented here', he says without even a smile. 'No way!, I know I speed, but I've only received four citations since moving back to Oklahoma in 2004'........'well, it's all here, and it also says your drivers license is suspended'. 'SUSPENDED? You cannot be serious, what on earth for, why didn't I receive notification'? 'I have no idea ma'am, but you're driving on an expired, suspended license, I can't help you....here's the number to the Department of Public Safety...you'll have to clear it up with them'. 'Okay, thanks........but I still don't understand a page & a half of documentation....I did not receive any tickets from 1987 thru 2003'.......'well, ma'am, these records go back to 1974'..........well, that explains that part! So I tuck my tail between my legs & go home. 'Hello, DPS'? 'Yes, how can I help you'? 'This is fran'.....'I need your DL#'...'It's blah, blah & blah blah blah & why is my license suspended'? 'Because you didn't pay a ticket on time, you have been suspended since April, 2008, we sent you a letter'. 'I never received a letter, and I went before the Judge & everything was paid & cleared'! 'No ma'am, everything was not cleared, you need to send us a money order for $50.00 to re-instate your drivers license'. I stayed calm and polite, but thought 'well shit, there's another procrastinating fifty damn dollars! I sent off my money order, so with luck on my side, & Friday the 13th gone, I will be able to re-instate my drivers license & get to the Tag Agency before my thirty day grace period expires on my license plate! Progress report: Procrastination: D Patience: A+

my old friends...are now, really old!

A few days ago, was the anniversary of the passing of my very good friend Costas Dalacos. He died three years ago and it was heartbreaking news from Lula. He & his wife, Lula were a fantastic couple, full of fun & laughter at all times. I used to love to visit them in Tarpon Springs, Florida. I met Costas in '70 or '71 while he and a couple of his co-workers, Joe & T.J., were FAA residents at Don Quixote, an apartment complex I managed here in OKC. They also followed me through the years to reside @ railhead......as did some of their children, also employed with the FAA. OMG!, what a crazy character Costas was! I think he was loved by everyone he encountered. During his tenure with the FAA, I made a few trips to Florida to spend time with he & Lula. I loved them, I loved their zest for life, their committment to one another, their humor. That humor & laughter filled every room everyday! And, the greek cooking lessons I would receive each visit. Gus would go out on the dock in their backyard, and catch fish. I loved going to PAPPAS' every visit. Tarpon is a wonderful Greek community.

'Gus' retired from the FAA in October, 1985. I was invited to attend his 'retirement party' as a speaker. My speach was only to read a poem I had written for him:

I have loved thee Costas, In my fashion:

I've composed a little ditty,

a poet I am not, it's a pity.

the day I first met thee,

was on tenth street @ Don Quixote

there was you, T.J. & Hampton,

with all those phone wires running rampton.

Remember how you borrowed my wig & dress

to wear to Glen's Hick'ry Inn & you caused such a mess!

and, the day from the Academy place,

when you pulled from your briefcase, a starter's pistol, to everyone's surprise

almost causing your instructor's demise?

And our canoe trips down the Illinios

taking the bus was only half the joy!

You were always our hiliarous 'MC'

introducing the joke 'wathy, wathy', by 'Madam Du Pwee'

and the summer when Lula came out

and the two of you, Joe & I

went to the 'Red Dog Saloon', what a 'bout'.

My trips to your home are always such a pleasure

no better Host & Hostess can I measure

I'll never foget our festive night @ The Sparta when we danced with glee

You even got me a date with Pappas' 'maitr'e d

I could go on and on, but I'm through

Only to remind you once again, that I love you.

speaking of parts...remember, barbara?

Since I'm on the topic of 'girl parts', and passing information along from generation to generation, I must include this one. When I was a young teenager living with gramma black (morgan) & her new husband, bill in the early '50's, we did not have running water..........well, we did sorta.....we had an indoor pump from our cistern sitting on a counter in the back porch. We took baths once a week in a big galvanized tub, sitting smack dab in the middle of the kitchen floor. We also had a small area with a stand, wash basin, mirror & medicine cabinet.

Gramma Black was one of the most positive persons on earth. She was jolly & happy.........always. Every morning she would sing me awake.......'when the red, red, robin goes bob, bob, bobbin along, along' and, whistle non stop. You know, the kind of high pitched whistle you do between your teeth. As I would groom myself in a wash basin, getting ready for school,( I learned this procedure from my best friend, Rosemary Card) Gramma would always say: 'now francie, remember to wash up as far as possible, then, wash down as far as possible, then WASH POSSIBLE'!

When lauren was around nine or ten, she came down to spend the nite with me. As she was showering, I hollered into the bathroom: 'remember to rinse all the shampoo out of your hair, and oh, be sure and scrub your whole body'. 'Don't worry taotao, I even washed possible'.

taotao....my 'po-po' hurts

Lauren may get upset with me for this post now that she is a teenager..nah, probably not, she knows me to well,

We have been trying to potty train rileigh shea and she is resisting big time. She kept saying her 'po-po' hurt. Vicki takes her to the doctor and she was diagnosed with a urinary tract infection. He prescribed her medication & tells vicki this is not unusual during potty training. In our family, your 'po-po' is your girl parts. I don't know the origination, probably came from my mother in law. I used the word with vicki when she was a baby, and she has used it with all three of her girls.

When lauren was around four yeas old, she walked in on vicki drying off from a shower. She is sitting on the sofa in deep thought with a concerned look on her face. When vicki walks in, lauren says 'mama, why do gills (girls, can't pronounce her R's) have hayeh on their po-po's'? 'Oh, I don't know lauren, they just do. 'When you get older and are a big girl, you will get hair on your legs, and under your arms, and, on your po-po'. 'Well, I don't want any on mine'! 'I know lauren, I didn't want any on mine either when I was little, but that is how God made us'. She sat there for a few minutes, smiled and said 'well, I guess it will be okay, at least it covers up the cwack'!

Thats our positive lauren!